How Social Media Distorts Beauty Standards and What I Tell My Clients

I need to talk about something that comes up in my clinic almost every day. A client pulls out her phone, shows me a photo from Instagram or TikTok, and says, "I want to look like this."

And my heart sinks a little. Not because wanting to look good is wrong — but because the image she's showing me isn't real. It's filtered, edited, posed in perfect lighting, and often the result of tens of thousands of dollars in procedures that were then further digitally enhanced.

I'm Raya, and one of the most important parts of my job — one that nobody really talks about — is helping my clients in Plano separate reality from the filtered fantasy that social media sells.

The Filter Problem Is Bigger Than You Think

Let me be blunt. Most of the "flawless" faces you see on social media don't exist in real life. Not even on the person who posted them.

Filters smooth skin, enlarge eyes, slim noses, plump lips, lift cheekbones, and erase every line, pore, and texture from the face. They do this automatically and seamlessly. And many of them are so subtle that you don't even realize a filter is being used.

The result? We're all walking around comparing our real, unfiltered faces to digitally altered images. And we're wondering why we don't measure up. Of course you don't measure up — you're comparing yourself to something that doesn't physically exist.

I've had clients show me their own filtered selfies as their "goal" image. Think about that for a second. They want me to make their real face look like a digital version of their own face. That's how deep this goes.

"Instagram Face" and Why I Don't Create It

You know the look. Exaggerated cheekbones. Overfilled lips. Snatched jawline. Fox eyes. Zero visible pores. It's a homogenized, almost cartoonish version of beauty that erases ethnic features, age, and individuality.

The problem isn't just that it looks artificial — although it does. The problem is that it's not achievable in real life without extreme intervention, and even then, it only looks "right" on camera with specific angles and lighting.

In person, Instagram Face often looks puffy, disproportionate, and stiff. I've seen it up close. I've also treated clients who got that look elsewhere and came to me to help them look like themselves again.

I refuse to create Instagram Face in my practice. And when a client asks for it, I explain why — gently, honestly, and with genuine care for their wellbeing.

What I Actually Tell My Clients

When someone shows me a social media reference photo, here's typically how our conversation goes:

"That photo has been heavily edited." I'll point out the telltale signs — skin that's too smooth to be real, proportions that don't match natural anatomy, shadows that don't align with the lighting. Most people genuinely don't realize the extent of digital editing on these images.

"Let's focus on your face, not someone else's." Your face has its own beauty, its own proportions, its own character. The best results come from enhancing what you already have, not trying to replicate someone else's features on your face. What looks gorgeous on one person can look completely wrong on another.

"Let me show you what's realistic." I'll use the mirror, sometimes some imaging, to show what a natural enhancement of their own features would look like. Often, clients are pleasantly surprised that a subtle improvement to their own face looks better than the dramatic transformation they thought they wanted.

"You're more beautiful than you think." I mean this every time I say it. Many of the clients who come in feeling bad about their appearance are genuinely attractive people who've been warped by comparing themselves to fake images. Sometimes just saying "your face is beautiful and here's why" is the most important thing I can do.

The Mental Health Piece

I'm not a therapist, and I don't pretend to be. But I'd be irresponsible if I ignored the mental health implications of what social media does to self-image.

Studies consistently show that increased social media use correlates with higher rates of body dissatisfaction, anxiety, and depression — especially in young women. When you spend hours looking at "perfect" faces, your brain starts to believe that's normal. And when your own face doesn't match, it feels like something is wrong with you.

Nothing is wrong with you. Something is wrong with the standard.

If I sense that a client's desire for treatment is driven primarily by social media comparison rather than a genuine personal goal, I'll have a frank conversation about it. Sometimes I'll recommend they take a break from social media before making any treatment decisions. And occasionally, if I think what someone really needs is a conversation with a therapist rather than a syringe, I'll say that too.

That might lose me business. I don't care. Ethics come first.

How to Use Social Media Responsibly

I'm not saying you should delete Instagram. Social media can actually be a useful tool for researching treatments, finding providers, and seeing real results. The key is being intentional about how you consume it.

Follow providers who show real, unfiltered results. Before-and-afters with consistent lighting and no editing. Accounts that show the process, including bruising, swelling, and healing time.

Unfollow accounts that make you feel bad about yourself. This sounds simple, but it's powerful. If someone's content consistently makes you feel inadequate, remove it from your feed. You're in control of what you see.

Remember that even "no filter" posts are often curated. Perfect lighting, perfect angle, perfect moment. A photo can be unfiltered and still not representative of what someone looks like in everyday life.

Look at people in real life. Seriously. Look around you. Look at the beautiful, diverse, imperfect faces of real people. That's what humans actually look like. And it's gorgeous.

What Real Beauty Looks Like

Real beauty has pores. It has lines. It has asymmetry. It has character. It moves, it expressions, it changes throughout the day.

Real beauty looks different on every single person. It's not a template. It's not an algorithm. It's not a filter.

My job as an injector isn't to make everyone look the same. It's to help each person look like the best, most confident version of themselves. That means celebrating differences, not erasing them.

Let's Have an Honest Conversation

If you're in Plano, Frisco, Allen, McKinney, or the DFW area and you're thinking about aesthetic treatments, I want to be a voice of reason in the noise. At Aesthetic Touch by Raya, we start with your real face, your real goals, and a real conversation about what's achievable and beautiful for YOU.

Book a consultation today. Let's talk about what you actually want — not what a filter told you to want.

*Aesthetic Touch by Raya is located in Plano, TX, serving clients throughout Frisco, Allen, McKinney, and the DFW metroplex.*